Special Forces Tactical Paddle. I am a Master in Hand to Ass combat. I've been known to attack breasts, top of thighs, vaginas, bottom of the feet and other places of interest. I am the LAST Paddle you ever need to recruit (buy). I am guaranteed for life. If I ever succumb in the line of duty, all you need to do is send a Pict of my lifeless body next to my vanquisher be it ass or whatever part of the body, and one of my brothers will take my place. All you need to do is pay my shipping and handling then I'm on my way to you!
I am made from the finest quality Baltic Birch Plywood. My handle has been dipped in special Performix PlastiDip so I will hang in there with you and not slip under the most extreme conditions.